DEEP WON!
When Purpose Finally Makes the Process Make Sense
I just realized I haven’t written here in a while.
And if I’m honest, it’s not because I had nothing to say. It’s because I’ve been slowly shifting into a space of knowing that all this time, I wasn’t crazy.
It was the gift in me fully activating.
It was the disconnect from things that no longer aligned once purpose started introducing itself to me in a deeper way.
To think or maybe I should say to finally accept that the entire time I was hearing, seeing, sensing, and feeling from a place of divine downloads, it now makes sense.
It makes sense why certain people had to fall off.
It makes sense why things that used to entertain me no longer do.
It makes sense why certain environments started feeling heavy.
It makes sense why what once felt normal now feels out of alignment.
It even makes sense why all of what happened had to happen.
Because sometimes purpose will make you look back and realize that nothing was random. The warfare, the separation, the discomfort, the silence, the pressure, the shifting; it was all working something in me and pulling something out of me.
It is not easy being this gifted and having to fight demons daily.
And yes, I said demons.
Because the more gifted you are, the more attacks will come spiritually. And in many cases, those spiritual attacks will manifest in the natural. They may come through people, delays, distractions, misunderstandings, emotional heaviness, or even the sudden feeling that you are questioning what you know God already said.
That is where discernment has to come into full action.
Discernment is not just about seeing what is wrong. Sometimes discernment is about recognizing what is not aligned with where God is taking you.
Sometimes discernment is knowing when the room shifted.
Sometimes discernment is feeling the weight of something before it even speaks.
Sometimes discernment is being able to tell the difference between fear, warfare, wisdom, and warning.
What I’m feeling right now is that I have to become more intentional about everything I’m feeling. Not just for me, but because I don’t know who I may really be touching. I don’t know who may read what I release and realize they are not crazy either. I don’t know who may see their own process through my transparency.
So yes, I’m back.
And if I’m honest, I’m also releasing the fear of people saying, “He deep now.”
Because not too long ago, I was sitting in a hotel room in Dallas, Texas, thinking about all the shifting that has happened in my life. I was at the desk, processing everything, and I said to myself, “People are going to think I’m deep.”
But then I heard God say, “Turn that around.”
And what I saw was prophetic all by itself.
DEEP WON.
The transition from now to won showed me something.
Maybe the very thing I thought people would judge is the very thing that proves I survived.
Maybe being “deep” was never the issue.
Maybe deep is what won.
Deep prayer.
Deep discernment.
Deep obedience.
Deep processing.
Deep separation.
Deep surrender.
Deep faith.
Deep warfare.
Deep healing.
Deep becoming.
Because shallow could not have carried me through this season.
Surface could not have survived what I had to survive.
Casual could not have discerned what I had to discern.
And normal could not have carried what God placed on my life.
So if they say I’m deep now, that’s fine.
Because DEEP WON!
So yes, this is officially one of the things I’m feeling.
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